I’ve been spending a lot of time with a new group of people at work and they’ve been mostly talking about their love lives. One just broke up with someone, another one hoping to finally find love, while the other one’s looking at the choices.
The past 2 years I’ve been working for the company and maybe past year I’ve spent with these people, they have learned that i’m:
a. Separated for 3 years;
b. A single Mom and;
c. Haven’t been with anyone else — not even a date since I was separated.
They’ve constantly wished me a love life. a happy, family life and s romantic relationship. A guy – finally.
With good intentions, they’ve been trying to find me someone to set me up with. All very keen to find me the “right guy.” They’ve been asking me my “type.”
I thought. Thought reaaalllyyy hard. Then, I realized, I had no “type.” I do not know what I want – at least in terms of how they look like. All I know is that I know it when I’ve spoken to them or have known them through their own written and/or spoken words. Words have a lot of bearing to me.
He’s got to make sense. He’s got to show passion AND compassion. He’s got to be sincere and shouldn’t care for the shallow, earthly things (i.e. me not being hot enough :p or that I do not own something..) He must have been through something that’s genuinely hurt him and made him understand life better.
He’s got to know my son and get along well with my son. He’s got to share my values. I don’t want to try and change for someone. If I find myself trying to be somebody I’m usually not, then he’s not it. However, if I find myself doing new things and actually releasing more of myself – then he’s got to be something.
I kept telling them I just want John Mayer. ahhahaha, silly and I know, impossible — but I do mean that. Of course, I’m talking about the John Mayer in my head. The kind of John Mayer I’ve created in my head. I’m not personal friend of his to actually know how and who he is but I guess the best way to show who or what kind of man I want, I’ll explain or try to describe the John Mayer in my head.
1. He’s got Passion. The way he makes music and plays it – that’s so much passion for me. When he talks about things he’s passionate about and you can just feel it is down right sexy to me.
2. Grounded. he’s been labeled a douche several times, I know – but he also knows he can’t control how media will portray him so he goes about it in a non-self destruct way (i know some people will disagree). He doesn’t take it lightly, but not too seriously either. He knows where and how to position himself in public without showing disrespect for anyone.
3. Great sense of Humor. His humor is my kind of humor. wordy – but not too nerdy that you’d have to be the 5th character in the Big Bang Theory TV Series to get it.It’s subtle and nonsense to some, but when you get – it’s downright hilarious.
4. Witty. I love anyone who can just play with words – make it humorous, smart, romantic and even arrogant without hurting anyone.
5. He knows what he has and he knows his boundaries. He knows he’s famous and if he needed to, he can use it to his advantage, so long as he doesn’t overstep boundaries. He can use his charms to get away with things, but he doesn’t always use it because he knows what’s right and wrong.
6. He has values and morals. again, he knows what’s right and wrong. nuf said.
7. He knows FAMILY.
Ah, yes. I recognize this is the picture of a PERFECT man… and if that’s the John Mayer in my head (add the real john mayer face, the real john mayer fame…. hmmm!) then everybody will want to be or meet THIS John Mayer.
But there you go – in no particular order or priority, these are what I’m looking for in a guy that i want to spend my lifetime with. Him and the rest of his wonderful family.